The 411 on our Illinois trip...

Well let me first start by telling you....THAT WAS ONE HELLUVA DRIVE! And I didnt even do the driving! The dumbest thing was that we went through Chicage I90 during Rush Hour on Monday...anyone who has been there can tell you that was a BIG mistake!! ten miles took about an hour..if not more...By the time we got to the hotel around 5 Rockermom time, we were bushed!!!

We cruised the area and found the company that would be Busters interview in the morning and then went to dinner at Bennigans...which was AWESOME, or as Buster put it "I could eat the asshole of a horse right now and it would taste good"...

Went back to the hotel and discovered I had only packed black panties and would be wearing white dress pants the next day..so we took a trip to a Mexican Sears...I swear to God..only Mexicans shopping there and only Mexicans working there....I fit in right nice :-)

This small town of Fox River Valley was situated as the name implies, right on the Fox River..very hilly, very pretty, and pretty much SNOBBY looking...I mean no wonder thier divorce rate is only 3 percent they had the biggest Lovers Lane store I had ever seen AND their very own Plastic Surgery Clinic...which you KNOW is mandatory in a town with a population of 12,000!!!! Now I thought to myself...if we move here and Buster gets bustin his balls and rollin in some real dough...would I have my nose, ass or boobs done first???

After the purchase of my new draws..we went back to the room and I decided it was finally time to hem the damn pants..this time for real. I forgot my sewing kit in the car and reluctantly went to retrieve it...on the way back up the stairs, I think I was being hit on by a 50-ish looking man lugging a suitcase full of ice cold Budweisers up the stairs..I tried and did keep our conversation short and graciously accepted the ice cold cerveca he offered me...then went up and hemmed my damn pants...

got up at 6 the next morining..the interview was scheduled for 8:30, we arrived at about 8:15 and met the president and ceo, and his right hand man..a 30 year old guy named Jason...who by the way were VERY nice and professional people. CEO Jim explained that Buster would need to fill out paperwork and as he did so I could wait right next to him in the room and look through some of the emails he weekly sent his employees..

Buster had to take a test and we were in the damn room for like 2 hours..I looked through endless emails and literature pertaining to his company functions. Lets see at last years Christmas parties ( and the previous 2 years) he gave a raffle and about 3 employees won 1000 cash and 3 others won 500 cash, on top of Bose stereos Gift Certificates for Day Spas, and The Grand prize was a trip for 2 all paid to the Bahamas...keep in mind that there are maybe 30 people employed there...oh yeah all the employees kids get to submit a Santa request before hand cause he was gonna show up at the party...for ANYTHING they want! Lets see each employee gets to stay at the 1300 square foot "cabin" on the lake up north that the company owns..supplied with boats, tackle and 600 dollars cash for anything else you need..for a whole week..with PAY, they are allowed to take up to 7 peoplewith them friends family or whatever..so as I sat there reading all this I decided this would be an AWESOME place to work...after breakfast we really were thinking otherwise...

In order for Buster to work in the state of Illinois as a lisenced plumber, he would only be given one chance to take the state exam..if he failed it he would have to finish like 4 years apprenticeshep before he could retake the exam...and folks..aprenticesses dont make squat more than he is making right now...AND the cost of living is like double over there..im sure youre all aware...

SO it was basically up to us whether or not we wanted to risk it all and move over there..IF he failed the test we'd be screwed so we decided not to take the job.

The trip on the way back was a real TRIP..we again hit chicago Tuesday during rush hour, and detoured downtown to catch some dinner and some sights...I screamed like a little fucking kid at one point cause I thought Buster was gonna crash us into a concrete wall...im so embarrassed, he was entering an undergroung parking garage, and well my vision isnt what it used to be and everything blended all together...you know you can take the girl out of the cornfield but you cant take the well ya know the rest...

Now I do have a few more street smarts than Buster being from the hood (detroit) and all but that was like 18 years ago...We walked like 40 blocks (it seemed ) to get to the dumb ass Hard Rock Cafe to be sadly dissapointed in an overrated little restaurant. I would much rather eat at the Forester Inn...she gave us menus and there was NOOOway I was gonna pay 25.00 for a dinner or 11.00 for a sandwich. I wanted some real authentic sloppy greasy Chicago food. After we came out of the damn place a Black guy immediately attacked Busters feet with a damn brush and some Kiwi shine...and we kept walking the motha fucka followed us no matter, He said "Buster I can sees u a honest mans, and I tell u what. If I can guess how many kids yo daddy had u get this shoe shine fo free, an iffen I kaent, u pay me 8 dollas a shoe...I tell u yo Daddy aint had no kids...Yo MOMMA had them...now gimme the money cmon cmon" I whispered to buster "YOU ONLY HAVE TWO DOLLARS" *hint hint* he didnt get it...he gave the brotha a 10 spot in shic he gladly accepted and then he hailed us a cab (the homey)..In the cab I was kinda pissed about the deal, but Buster honestly didnt know...

SOO we made it to South Bend Indiana where we slept in a crack hotel.it only cost 35 bucks but we were sotired we didnt care. I took a luke warm shower and there was little black curly hairs all bundled up in the corner of the shower floor...again too tired to care so we basically slept on top of the sheets til 10 minutes til checkout time...

Headed for Cornfield County after we stopped at KFC for lunch...and lo and behold if the ole Reno, I mean Michigan 911 didnt pull us over...and guess what for ? Cause we had a damn air freshener in the rearview and THATS illegal in Michigan, then they asked where we were coming from and we told them Chicago, so of course they made us both get out and crevice searched the car for drugs..I shit you not they told us this cause a lot of times people got Chicago to get their drugs, I wanted to tell them that Ileft my crack pipe at home that day, but then again I learned the hard way that state boys have NO sense of fucking humor...I learned this long ago..thats a whole nother blog which I will save for another day....no tickets to warnings. I think it helped that I was reading my Bible when both troopers came to each door and asked us to step out...I was right in the middle of the "Last Supper" dammit...and u wanna know something really fucked up? Ill be damned if they didnt thumb through them Bible pages to see if there was a sheet of acid or some shit in them...they checked every crack of the car but didnt open the laptop...I coulda hidden at least 20 sheets of acid in THERE!!! Maybe they were just bored.....

Well I hope I didnt Bore you all too much but anyhoo...thats the 411 on our Chicago trip...BTW Portelli's has the cheapest and best and sloppiest hot dogs in chicago....loaded YUM!!! With a Corona of course ;-)

Took those damn bottles and Cans Back!

BUT it paid off..I was able to get my brown strappy wedge heeled sandals (needed for husbands interview that I must Goto in Chicago next week) a new shirt to go with the new white pants from last year that I STILL havent hemmed yet, AND stuff to complete my Bulgarian shadowbox for the church which I will be happily presenting them with tomorrow! I hope they like it...Buster and Offspring 1 thinks its great..so if they like it, it must be good! If I had a digital camera (here I go again) I would take a pic of it to share with you all...take care, Have a Great Weekend as I may not blog or even get online till we get to our hotel in Illinois on Monday!! Wish us luck!!

Love
Halfmexicanmama
aka-Jill, Jillybear,the Jillmeister ;-)

Dreams, Chores and more...:-)

OMG I had an AWFUL dream last night...in between the 2 hours of sleep I think I actually got...damn my muscles are still not used to this excercise crap...anyhoo, I dreamt me and Hoesby were gonna meet around the airport in Chicago for a visit, she would drive from MN and I leaving MI at the appropriate time should meet up with her sometime in the early afternoon. SUPOSSEDLY (dont know if i spelled that right,dont care u know what im trying to say) we made all the arrangements via email the previous day and it was all set. I got up that morning and went about my usual routine of bitching at the kids, going potty, brusing hair, making coffee etc...the day wore on and nothing was unusual until I got a call from Mr. Shaky around 5 or 6 that evening, he said "Jill, where are you" and I replied "Home, where are you" he wasnt amused but I could tell in his voice he was VERY pissed off. He said "Hoesby went all the way to Detroit and tried to go all the way to the homeland,she called me CRYING her butt off cause YOU didnt show up in Chicago!" I swear I had no Idea what he was talking about, he pretty much told me I was full of dogshit cause he was looking right at her emails from yesterday and I agreed to the little trip..just never showed up.

As I tried to check me Inbox and Outbox my dumb ISP kept giving me error messages and honestly for the life of me I dod not remember making plans...didnt matter all I could think about was my BFF Crackwhore Buddy crying her ass off and turning around in Detroit to head back to MN...she wouldnt answer my cell calls either...knowing that I just lost a BFF Hoe for life I think I actually cried in my sleep last night...then I woke up and was SO relieved to know it was a dream...I had to actually ponder it for a minute and was really tempted to get up and check my email..

Oh I love you my BFF Crackwhore...and I will never stand you up.

If I do, please dont shun me for life, or cut my boobies off..
were all human and all make mistakes. I think what the dumb dream actually simulated my subconcious thoughts...my trip to Chicago next week (in 3 days) and my want/need to see my Crackwhore Homegirl...the mind is a terrible thing to waste boys and girls and mine is wasting away by the millisecond,

WARNING : DONT DO DRUGS NEVER EVER EVER! not even the kind that come in the pretty shiny brown bottles...notice prescription drugs and beer and cocaine all tend to come in some type of brown bottle ( I dont do any drugs by the way im just very streetwise boys and girls, i'll drop for u right now to prove it)

On another note..we got the girls new bikes last night...which was fun, Buster is 6 ft. tall and took off down the street on a 7 year old girls bike purple streamers and all flapping in the wind behind him...I sooo cant wait to get a digital camera!! I am missing so many damn moments! It took me long enough to get this laptop so I figure if I play my cards right I can have one by the time im 40.

Things I must accomplish today:
Im really only typing this as also a reminder to myself. From here till Monday is busy busy BUSY!

1. Balance Checkbook

2. Gather all unwanted clothing and food items for Brother Hicks, who is a missionary to the homeless in Detroit, he is coming on Wednesday which i'll be gone still so I have to get this stuff to the chuch tomorrow when I go to help clean it.

3.Goto scrapbook store and get shit for my Bulgarian Shadowbox for the church which I must have finished by this Sunday. Tired of waiting for Aquaintence Friend Karen to help me.

4. Take all bottles and cans to WalFart that are beginning to take over my backroom. I should have enough there to treat myself to a new bra or them strappy brown wedge heeled sandals I was caught eyeballin last night. Hell I might even have enough left over for a haircut too. Im guessing there is 20 to 30.00 back there.

5. Hem my new white pants I bought last year. I still havent removed the tag off em or hemmed them yet but I need them for the trip...

6. Wash all bedding and any laundry. Sounds easy but I have to haul my shit to the laundr-o-mat, as there is no washer dryer hook up in our west side rental shack...

And that about sums it up!

Spring is coming cause Moose A. Moose said so!

Yup...I heard it for myself this morning, and I am not hung over today. I just took O#1 to school and came back (satellite got fixy by Mr. Unlce Brian last nite) I turned on Noggin which is me and O#2's morning ritual and a wonderful masculinely/yet womanly voice chorused the following:

"Rest assured you know its true, Spring is coming just for you..."

So there. NOW I know it will warm up soon cause Moose A. Moose dont lie, or talk shit...cause he's not in the Shit business he works for Noggin, and has a very affluent career therein....

Ahem...."Goodbye Sanjaya, Good riddance too, we no longer have to look at your freakin doo."

(Iwrote that myself) thinking a little about experimenting with some poetry writing these days. Let me know what you think.

Speaking of talents...Buster made his own funny last night as he was helping himself to dinner. He said "Hey, guess why you dont own a watch?" I could tell he was trying to make a joke so of course I said "Why, why Buster dont I own a watch?" and he replied (drumroll please) "Cause I put a clock on the stove for you." I had to give it to him..that was kinda funny..he's been listening and watching a lot of Rodney Carrington these days (dont even get me started on that) who is by far the biggest wife basher out there. Makes me wonder if he even has a wife cause if he were my husband there would be no way on Gods green earth I would let him get up there and talk about me that way...

Well Im gonna snooze now cause I was sleeping so good before I had to get up and take a certain 7 year old to school...O2 is snoozing on the couch with a blanket and a good episode of Pinky Dinky Doo.....

I may have babbled about this shit b4

Soo went for that 2 or 3 mile walk last night with my personal trainer..who happens to be 7 years old and ridin a bike with a lisence plate with her name on it. But she kept me going by sayin things like "c'mon Mom pick up the pace..your slacking now..lets get rid of that flab momma" but you know what ? I LOVED it..thats what i need some good old fashoined motivation. So shes my work out buddy now....
Then I came home and my freakin satellite was out all day, i got the motha f**ka to work BUT u can only watch what is scheduled to record...i mean NO live tv what soever..I called dish network and they want 99 dollars to send a tech out..I told them politely "well im not on a fuckin contract and i can switch toDirect tv or at and t for FREE...then they said well we can reduce it to 29 dollars but thats as low as we can go...I pay 70.00 a month for SATTELITE service...they are making a frekin fortune off all our dumb asses...what does it cost to put a damn satelllite into orbit? a couple million? they make that in a month...IN PROFIT..I know I used to work for a cellphone provider for 8 years, after the initial investment thers almost nothing to pay for...enough about that. I could go on for hours.

American Idol last night was pretty good, im a fan of country music not a BIG fan but a fan...particularly of last nights mentor Martina McBride..Phil kicked ass with his Keith Urban song choice, but Jordin trying to sing Martina's Broken Wing about had me sharting in my seat! U cant no matter how hard u try duplicate Martina..she sang that song soooo WEAK..the song is about a wife putting up with an abusive husband and how she gets out of the relationship blahblahbla...soooo I say the girl is 17...how the hell can she sing THAT...I extremely believe that you have to sing from the heart like u know maybe experience the shit or something...im sure at 17 she hasnt taken the stupid plunge yet...or yet alone been in an abusive relationship so what the fuck does she know what shes singin about???

I am trying not to have such a potty mouth last more, but I was a bad sinner and dipped into Grandpa Dans cough syrup last night a little too much and stayed up til about 5 am...something I SWORE I would not do again..but it was there..It wa smy bad decision..at least I didnt like streak through the house like SOMEONE I know, or flash anyone or piss on the floor in front of people...I was a contained drunk, I downloaded a bunch of music and talked half the night to Karen..she's an aquaintence of mine..see I dont have any real "friends" around here..I cant trust none of the motherfucking crackwhores in this town..there all a bunch of lying, two faced, fuck with your husband types...therfore I trust no woman..and I mean NONE..learned my lesson with all that...there are very few I can trust and theywill probably be the only ones that read this....

OMG im watching the recording of AI from last night and I didnt make it far enough to see Blake sing the song Blue which is another of my favs i LIKE him and this song..dammit and i only voted for Phil...Im so fucking stupid...Ive already swore like a sailor so I may as well make the most of if...I will repent tonight..believe you me!

Anywho..Im gonna call this shit a rap now...dont do anything I wouldnt do and if you do make sure you put chocolate syrup on it first...

I AM going to start an exercise regime!!

This year has een EXTREMELY hard for me for some reason when it comes to "eating right" and exsercise...Now just like 90 percent of the rest of the country my lame ass New years resolution is "to lose weight"...the past couple of years has been successful, but this year is HORRIBLE...I dont know why I dont "Just Do It"...I dont know why I grab that greasy ass bag of chips, I dont know why I lay my lazy ass on the couch when I should be up and doing SOMETHING!!! Well Ive decided that today is the start of my getting in shape plan..Why? I will list a few reasons for you...

1. My boobs are starting to point to the floor.

2. I get tired easily.

3. I want to fit into last years cute little summer clothes that I spent so much money on.

4. I want to be able to play outside and keep up with my kids, instead of walking a half a mile and wanting to take a nap.

5. My boobs are starting to point to the floor.

6. Self Confidence.

7. Health reasons.

AND 8. My boobs are STARTING TO POINT TO THE FLOOR!!!

So im jumping on the wagon today! And no one is going to stop me!!!

Todays Myspace blog post..enjoy

Current mood: cranky Category: Movies, TV, Celebrities
Buh Bye Haley from American Idol...
You were never a fav of mine, you had a few so-so performances but I cant even recall what they were...Im sure you will succeed in your future endeavors. Just goes to show that next time you dont need to be so revealing, look where it got ya now...
But you got to meet some really cool people and stay in Hollywood for a while..thats a whole buttload more than I can say for myself is this piss-poor little town...but I dont have pity parties for myself on Thursdays..I save those for Saturday nights when the real Pitiful ones are looking to party tee-hee...take it how you want, I really dont care. The people who really know me know how to take me...
Again, Till next time take care of yourselves, and each other....(compliments of Mr. Gerald Springer)