My friend and I took the children on a little field trip to the park last night.
Upon arriving at the park, Halfmexican Mama was stricken with severe gastrointestinal pain.
So.
You probably already guessed it....
I had to to....
#3.....
yep....
IN THE PORTA POTTY!!!
It has always a nightmare of mine...I detest those things....
I dont have to go into detail to tell you why.
But the pain was so severe, I had sprint my way to that makeshift craphouse......
And......OMG!
IT was just cleaned......NEVER USED!!!!!
I was sooooo excited I nearly lost my stool right then and there......Oh and I just happened to have a copy of a book I was reading which came in really handy during my "stay".
Im sure I looked really fine to those studly basketball players who saw me emerge from the craphouse with a book in hand......sheesh....who do I have to impress anyway???
Poor Little Bean about had her own accident....disappeared for a minute so I hollered out for her...we were the only ones on the play side of the park, so I was sure she didnt go far...
then I heard "MAMA"....coming from behind a tree....then....I heard.....two words that I REALLY didnt want to hear...
"I PEE"
"Yes I know your behind the tree baby come on out".......
and she did...
I so wish I had the cam last night...she came out from behind the tree...in broad daylight, in the middle of a public park naked from the waist down....
YEP....she's definitely her mothers child.
So we had to throw her panties away in the trash can right next to the "pee tree" cause they were soaked and there was no way I was carrying them home...her shorts were still dry though....for some reason she still hasnt grasped the concept that the world is not your toilet...
Neither has her mother!
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Does anyone know what happened to the Ellen Degeneres show??? That was like my favorite show.....
Everyday I watched or recorded it....I could ALWAYS count on her to make me chuckle....I have Dish network so keep that in mind....
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My puppy is trying to chew his way out of a metal cage right now....
Funny thing is I actually think he is making progress...
God Speed Little Dog..Godspeed!!
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Im going to wrap this up for today cause im a hungry hoe...and I want coffee too..and I have a lot on my plate for today...
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Next time you eat a taco....THINK OF ME!!!
Peace Out
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21 comments:
OMG an unused porta potty.. that is like the holy grail. Something you only "hear" about.. but never see!
You lucky girl...I took the girls to the park on Monday and those potty's were nasty.
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow night because that is the plan to have taco's for dinner.
Patti's comment cracked me up! At least you made it to the potty! would have been way worse to come out, book in hand, poop in pants.
Ummmm...tacos! I was wondering what to make for dinner! Thanks!
Patti...It was so clean...I swear I could still taste the smell of the soap in my throat when I went to bed last night...aaahh a once in a lifetime happening...im so lucky!
Alisha...we must remember now that PP cleaning day is Tuesdays...during the day cause I went up there around 7 last night!
Wendy...a good taco never hurt anyone!
I would be so horrified to have to use a porta potty - esp for THAT! How awesome that it was brand new. I have never encountered that before.
You call your daughter Little Bean? That's funny. That's one of the nicknames for our youngest son, Julian. We started out calling him Jellybean, which got shortened to bean, and sometimes beaner. LOL.
ok..what the hell is number 3?...I thought shitting was number 2..
Im confused..
I dont like hearing about your friends..nope..not one bit.
My guess is number 3 is when number 2 comes out LIKE number 1, and there you have, number 3!!! When does it end, I'm kind of over having to use public pottys all the time, usually I drag the kids along, so everyone thinks I'm taking THEM! Haha!
Tee..thanks for stopping by, I promise to return the love...
FFG...Humin is right on about #3...kinda like what you had at the Hilton...woops did I say that out loud???
Humin...If I took my kids along they would be yelling "ooooh mom gross" for all the world to hear..trust me.!!
dont fret about your blogs worth..thats just what the blogs u have linked are worth..its all about linkage..
I must have for shit links cause mine is wort zero...before I switched addresses it was "worth" close to 300,000...
not sure where I went wrong...musta took some damn good links down..sho..
ok ....im not so worried now..
off to have someting grammed done my face have fun and i love the potty part.....
JAM...Good Luck...let us know how it turns out!!
So what's wrong with a book in the pot? I have an entire library in my bathroom oh and the manchild - as he was just finished potty training, used to carry books in there too! Cracked me right up.
Thanks for stopping by yesterday to wish my girl a happy birthday!
Hey Cheeky..
Im all about lavatorial libraries, but i dont know about having them in a porta john..dont think Id want some stranger reading my fancy literature ;-)
Thanks! Ill have to stop by your page more often for another dose of Cheeky-in-the-flesh :-)
Oh I hate those porta potty things. But I hate having the screamin' craps even worse! I normally read the back of a shampoo bottle or anything I can reach whilst in the commode ;)
We have a lovely outhouse at our Kansas home. The hole is covered with a lovely, cushioned duck seat and lid. We installed a magazine rack with a lovely selection, a tap light and a toilet paper hanger. There is a half-moon cut into the door. It's just great for emergencies...unless there happens to be a snake in residence. Kudos to you for telling it like it is. After all bodily fuctions are important.
Carmen..been there done that lol!
Grannie...nice to see ya..your lavatorial accomodations sound five star!
went in came out
cool beans JAM
Porta Potties can be hitonious, so you really lucked out. I had to use a couple of them while we were on our driving vacation. They were NOT fresh, and my suffering while using them was intense. Pure hell.
The fact that you carried a book into an outhouse is quite funny & kind of geeky in a cool way.
You are entered into the raffle!! I wish I had diamonds to offer as prizes, but it's not to be.
Every kid has to pee his/her pants every once in awhile. It keeps them humble.
Enjoy your weekend!!
JD...didnt plan on having the book in the lav...I happened to be carrying to read while the kids played...forgot to release it in my major emergency..it came in handy though ;-)
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